#this is a normal thing at the hotel

[im-just-a-br0adway-baby]

(The hotel crew goes about their day as Niffty scrubs Fat Nuggets' tracks from the floor. Vaggie looks up while sitting on the couch.)

Vaggie: Okay, how did the pig tracks get on the ceiling?

(Angel Dust is seen on the ceiling making Fat Nuggets pretend to walk on it)

Angel: 🎶Spider pig, spider pig🎶

🎶Does whatever a spider pig does🎶

🎶Can he swing from a web?🎶

🎶No he can't, cos' he's a pig🎶

🎶Look out! He is a spider pig!🎶

[starkspi]

From "Unadulterated Loathing" in which Charlie chains these two idiots accidentally together by @otsmosis (who made this comment at the end of the last chapter and inspired me to do whatever this is above)

[heart-of-the-morningstar]

I spend such an unhealthy amount of time thinking about being so comfortable with Lucifer while you two are making love that you are both laughing and smiling the entire time, refusing to be shy or feel embarrassed at all. Like imagine him looking at you like this while he’s buried so deep inside you…

I need to be sedated fr…

[shadebloopnik]

Unrequited/One-sided Radioapple but it isn't treated like an angsty end of the world thing.

Imagine they slowly get closer after all the banters, and eventually becoming close friends. Lucifer ends up catching feelings for him, and after a long while, decides to confess and ask Alastor if he felt the same.

Alastor admittedly does not feel the same.

He's getting uncomfortable, struggling to keep his composure because he's DONE this before. He KNOWS how this ends. He remembers Vox and all his insistent declarations of affection and desperate pleas for Alastor to reciprocate; the possessive entitlement. He remembers how all those sickly sweet words morphed into something venomous when he didn't give the lowlife what he wanted. He remembers the anger, the ridiculous notion that it was Alastor's fault why he was so mad, that Alastor led him on and that he obviously deserved something in payment for it all-

So yes, Alastor knows how this ends.

It doesn't mean he isn't disappointed though, because he actually LIKES Lucifer, far more than he ever did Vox. Perhaps not in the way the king might have wanted, but he did. He treasured their little talks, their drinking sessions, their shared love for their instruments, Lucifers singing, their little duets, the banter, the playful jabs, the sparring.

He'd even slowly grown accustomed to the other's touches, not feeling the same surge of disgust and discomfort whenever the shorter man would grab at his arm in excitement, forgetting his usual thoughtfulness of Alastor's touch aversion for the short moment of whatever distracted him. Alastor even enjoyed it at times, relaxing at the feel of soft feathers beneath his claws, or the sensation of gentle scratches against his ears.

Difficult as it was to admit, Alastor had grown to care for the angel, the same way he had for Rosie orv Mimzy.

But no matter how fond Alastor was of Lucifer, it didn't change the fact that he didn't feel the same way romantically, or even sexually. No way in the 7 rings of Hell was he going to lie to Lucifer about either, not going to even entertain the idea of pretending he reciprocated for Lucifer's sake. He respected his friend too much for that.

So a clear, direct rejection it is. It was a shame, but nothing could be done. He said his piece concisely, and waited, shoulders set, back straight, smile and eyes a careful blank canvas as he prepared for the inevitable.

Lucifer nodded, a normal soft smile still in place, "Thank you for your answer, it means a lot."

Which......what? Alastor expected an outburst, or at the very least sharp words.

What he did NOT expect was....acceptance? And not just that but, a happy one? Contentment?????

"You're....alright with that?", he had to ask, he had to. Lucifer was clearly just very good at masking his upset.

But the damn angel just smiled?? And it didn't even look fake, just as bright and soft as his normal smiles, albeit a little confused?? Lucifer smiled at him, his brows furrowing in a bit of confused disbelief, as though Alastor is being the weird one here.

"Uhh, yeah??? Why wouldn't I be??? Yeah I may have some feelings for you but its not like you're obligated to feel the same. Above anything else, we're friends first and foremost and i'm alright with that..."

Then he seemed to have reached his own little conclusion as his words trailed off, because suddenly Lucifer's eyes widened in realization of something, and his words picking up with a sense of panicked urgency.

Alastor would really like to know what Lucifer's supposed realization was about himself because he had absolutely no clue.

"I mean, we ARE still friends right?? I don't- I- I hope this doesn't like- change your opinion of me. You're not- oh gosh I'm not making you uncomfortable am I? I- I won't mention it! You can even forget this whole confession ever happened! We can just go on as before! I don't feel any different or would act any different! Honest! I mean, I don't regret confessing because you deserve to know and I'm not ashamed of my feelings, but I don't want you to be uncomfortable! It doesn't change the way i'll treat you! Or change any aspect of our relationship! I don't even think I like you more as a lover than as a friend! I really, really do love our friendship, it matters more to me than any thoughts of being in a romantic relationship with you! So please just forget it all-"

Alastor let the word vomit wash over him, every word leaving him more confused by the minute.

Because yes, there's the desperation he expected, but...it was more about, convincing Alastor to remain friends?? Reassuring Alastor that nothing has to change?? That their friendship is the most important thing here??

(If anyone asks, no Alastor's heart didn't swell. Only lesser beings would have had the urge to cry, and Alastor is anything but.)

Lucifer is unknowingly reassuring Alastor of every single one of his insecurities about the situation. Because Alastor DID want to remain friends, he cared too much about the man to let it go so easily. It was rare to find people who treasure friendships above romantic relationships.

"I don't tend to forget easily, nor will I forget this one in particular.", he spoke, finally finding his voice. At Lucifer's defeated, pained expression( is their friendship really that important to him?), he continued. "But....yes. I'd like that.. To remain...friends."

He didn't often say the word out loud, being comfortable enough with each other that it need not be reassured with the label. But with Lucifer brightening up like his namesake, relief and happiness palpable, Alastor felt no qualms at declaring their friendship out loud.

So life went on as usual. True to his word, Lucifer remained basically the same. The following weeks were a bit stilted for Alastor, as he put some rather painful distance between him and the angel; limiting their interactions, their usual touches.

Anytime now, Lucifer would break and show his true colors, Alastor would think, waiting for the boot to drop. Lucifer would end up angry, and dissatisfied, and that was that.

But it never happened. Lucifer never expressed discomfort when Alastor avoided him, seeming to be understanding of the others need for space. He was just as affectionate as before, though initially a bit held back, as though gauging Alastor's comfort.

Months would pass, and the king never faltered. Their friendship remained strong, if not growing ever closer than before. Alastor found himself even growing more comfortable with the man. Affectionate touches were becoming common, hugs and head pats and cuddles being a welcome thing, with the reassurance that the shorter king would never disrespect his boundaries.

Lucifer seemed genuinely happy about it, despite being clearly told that none of Alastor's actions hinted at anything romantic. In fact, he seemed ecstatic that Alastor was getting more affectionate towards him as a friend. The embarrassment the radio demon felt at having Lucifer basically tear up (no really, he was crying so hard, full on drama sobbing) with joy in front of him was intertwined with the sheer incredulous fondness he felt for the man at that moment.

They were sitting at a couch one night, more than a year passing since that confession. Lucifer was leaning back, resting against the cushions, while Alastor had his head on the smaller one's shoulder, nuzzling at the crook of his neck, legs tucked close to his body. Both had a book in hand, two nearly empty cups of tea on the table in front of them. Every so often, Lucifer would flex his fingers that rested on Alastor's head, running a digit against the other's ear, often prompting the demon to lean into the touch. White wings enveloped the two, blanketing them against the chill of the night.

As Alastor turned the page of his own book, relaxing into the touch of his dearest friend, he wondered how he ever got so lucky in hell.

[cringefailvox]

ideal radiostatic relationship progression for me personally is friends to enemies to codependency

[celtrist]

Controversial opinion: Vox's design sucks

...

Because he should be wearing a NORMAL TIE. not a BOWTIE. It would:

Add to his businessman persona

Give a place for that wifi symbol to go that isn't awkward

Be a good opposing design to Alastor's bowtie

Potentially give the idea he's moved away (or attempting to) from Alastor. Especially if they had it that Vox USED to wear a bowtie.

Also, we joke about it but seriously, why does everyone have a bowtie when it doesn't make sense for some characters like Husk--

I rest my case your honors.

...

Rebuttle:

Vox having the bowtie could signify him latching onto his past with Alastor and not being able to move on

[goldenamaranthe-blog]

Kid Vaggie: Hazbin Hotel

Charlie: (wakes up with a loud yawn and a stretch) Oh... shit.... how long was I out? ...Wait.... (feels her face and gasps) I'm an adult again! Vaggie! Good news-

Vaggie: (in child form, sleeping, drowning in her nightgown, hair is short like when she was an exorcist, and completely wrapped up in the fetal position with her little wings trying to cocoon her)

Charlie: (arrow through the heart) Awwwwww!

Vaggie: (wiggles, yawns, and snuggles deeper into her feathers with a peaceful hum)

Wings: (rustle and puff out their feathers)

Charlie: (plastering her hands over her mouth to keep herself quiet) Don't do it Charlie. Don't nom her. Don't om-nom her. Don't pick her up and try to bring her into yourself. Resist the adorable temptation.

[angelstitss]

i have nothing else to say about this. i am absolutely batshit.

confused? let me show you because after my months of analyzing this song i did not see this a SINGLE TIME until it was pointed out to me.

i’m going batshit insane. this is the reason why i need to be locked in a padded room.

right after alastor said that vox asked him to join his “team” and alastor said no.

there is no other explanation for this.

LALALALA IM GONNA DIE ‼️‼️‼️

WHAT WAS THE FUCKING REASON.

[hotluncheddie]

Steve: …Eddie we’re in Paris and all you seriously care about is the 4ft Garfield we saw outside some cafe?

Eddie: :]

[chaggiehearts]

Do people still use this kind of templates?

Anyway, my Chaggie headcanons :) disclaimer that this is just the way I interpret them, it’s 100% okay to disagree lol

[luck-of-the-drawings]

"And soda; runs off into the street..." "...and soda... is totally okay!"

[cloudysarts]

this show would be good if literally everything about it was different

[bear-cubs-art-things]

h e y

Its free husk and angel doodles real estate

[rottika]

could you draw Emily? please

Sure! Here, have the She. <3

[cringefailvox]

okay sometimes i see people talking about alastor's vocabulary as if he's remarkably verbose or witty compared to the other characters but i have to confess. i really didn't register it as unusual because that is also just how i talk on a regular basis

[celtrist]

You mentioned Vaggie trying to dress up Alastor in feminine style a couple of times, would you like to show us an example of such occurence?

(in other words, can we see Alastor in a dress, Vaggie can't be the only one who gets to see him like that)

The sort of outfits and ways she'll get him in said outfits will vary. Vaggie for the most part does genuinely try to find and put him in feminine clothes of his time (so she more than likely has gone to cannibal town for dresses). But she's definitely not opposed to putting him in more, shall we say... skimpy attire. Or things that perhaps don't fit quite right on him.

Other residents have 100% seen him outside his normal attire because of Vaggie. And have perhaps gotten a bit more of a show than Alastor would ever intend for anyone to see (though that's never Vaggie's intention).